What a fucking waste of an outfit
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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