Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
