why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize