This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize