My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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