This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
