dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
