I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
