it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Found the puke drawer
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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