That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
