i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
