So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
