I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
MIDGETS
????
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
