I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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