drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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