i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
