just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
