it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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