I wish I only lived at night.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Your cock deserves a montage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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