i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
