K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
