so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
