Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
soo... how was my night?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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