hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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