...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I deserve this hangover.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
