The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
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