Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
