Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
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I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
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You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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