You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
