oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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