Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
