YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
