Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
