We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Shame is for Republicans.
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