She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
