let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
