i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I don't want my vagina anymore.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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