he wants to bone in the snuggie
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
