You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
