My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
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Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
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I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.