Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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