dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
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