I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
