hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
