Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i want to swaddle you in tequila
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
