Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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