Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
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