Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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