Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
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