We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize
