I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
