Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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